My Christmas Wish

     There's been numerous things that I could have and maybe should have blogged about over the last few days. Like how there's been animosity between me and what I consider my "favorite cousin" because of goofy things. Fights in families never benefit anyone especially when I have to deal with them. I might speak my mind a little too much but what's wrong with that? If I have a problem with someone I tell them and now I'll blog about it. Maybe, I've been a little 'grouchy' lately but that's just because of what's happening around me. Sometimes I feel like I want someone to turn to but since I was about seven I've had people betray me. Actually, the very first betrayal I can remember was around then. Funny story too. My niece, who for whatever reason I'm not close to anymore, was in a play called the Nutcracker. Point of that story, that'll I'll keep to myself, is I remember that as my first betrayal. Being betrayed always leaves a distinctive taste in my mouth, especially if it's from someone who I consider close. Now, I'm not whining and saying that every time I get screwed over the world should stop. I'm just saying that its happened so many times now, why would I every trust someone fully again. There's a few people that I consider close to me right now and none of them know what I'm going through. Probably won't till it all comes to a conclusion.

     I almost started this next paragraph off by talking about another crappy friend of mine, but instead of being so gloomy and down I'll talk about something nicer. It's Christmas time my friends. Now, I know its been "Christmas time" for the past three weeks but now its actually here. On Saturday morning kids all across the country will be waking their parents up early to open up what surely will be the best gift they've ever received. I can remember times like that. When, if I didn't get that bike or basketball goal it was the end of the world. And now, seeing that it took my parents working all year long and never taking sick days and never slacking off and never complaining just so I could have that Playstation or Sega, it makes this time of year nicer, because parents all across the country are doing the same thing with their children. I drove through a park and saw a light show a few days ago and it reminded me of all those times of doing it with my parents. It'd be nice to be ten again and the only worry in the world be getting up for school. I guess I should 'wrap' this up, ha. My Christmas wish is I hope all this ends soon and everything turns out well, 'cause I like living in the house I'm in now.

My Sunday's

     Sunday for most people is a quiet day, a day for church and fellowship or a day for family time and relaxation from the work week. At the very least people fall asleep in front of the TV watching 60 Minutes or Extreme Home Makeover. But not me. Being a football fan my whole life, my Sunday's are set in stone for the rest of my life. 16 Sunday's, possibly more if my team makes the playoffs; a year I watch my Dallas Cowboys religiously. I haven't missed a game in years. More importantly I've missed other things because of games. The last few years though from noon till eleven I've watched football. I've started watching teams I really don't care about but it's still that much fun to watch them. Since, I'm a die hard NFC fan I used to have no teams that I like in the AFC but, also in the last few years I've been rooting for the Colts. I've always loved Peyton Manning, personally I think he'll go down as the greatest quarterback in history; but I was never that into his team. It seems now I'm watching the Browns and Bills just as much as I watch the Cowboys and Eagles. I will admit some of this reason has come from the fact that I'm playing Fantasy Football now and I like to keep up with my players first hand. But now, it's becoming me just watching every game that I get in my region. By no means am I addicted to football though. I can miss any game, except for Cowboys; at any time. Now, I can just use my phone and keep up with every detail. But by the time I wake up around eleven until I go to bed around midnight on Sunday I'm watching football or football highlights. That's just my Sunday's.

My Zombie Book

     I almost always start a blog thinking I really don't have much to say and then it turns into some odd rambling game for me. I'm gonna try to keep this one short and to the point.

     I read a book called The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection From The Living Dead over the last few days and I must say I really enjoyed it. It had everything a book should have, humor, facts and zombies. You really can't beat that. Plus its a relatively short book. Only about two-hundred pages or so. Shouldn't take anyone longer than a few days to read. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone.

     I went to my friends Christmas party last night, I suppose it wasn't too bad. Maybe it's because I'm getting older or maybe it's just nothing but parties are definitely getting more and more annoying. I'd much rather have a quieter party with a few of my close friends than see forty people I don't really like. But 'tis the season, right?

     Now, I'm off to play dominoes with some family. That's always a fun time for me.

My Pearl Harbor Day

     "My Day" really started last night when I couldn't sleep, maybe two total hours. My morning started off like any other morning. My alarm going off too early and me just absolutely needing nine more minutes of sleep. Then, I realized I had forgotten my doctor's appointment was only thirty minutes away and I still need to shave and shower. Needless to say, I was a good ten minutes late but thankfully the receptionist was in a good mood and checked me in anyway. They're way too strict at my doctor, they'll turn you away if you're just a few minutes late so it was quite lucky of me to catch this lady in a good mood. And I have to say, this receptionist is maybe twenty-five and already she's given up on putting makeup on in the morning or fixing her hair. She could definitely be attractive if she tried at all but every time I see her she looks like someone close to her either just died or she was just divorced. Not an attractive look I must say. So, after she checked me in I sat down and wasn't there but three minutes and they were calling my name, which made me ecstatic because it can easily take an hour or longer to get in. As I followed my nurse to the back I noticed they had started putting up Christmas decorations but whoever started must have been hurried or wasn't finished because it looked like a couple of four year olds just drew on the walls. Another thing I noticed was all but one of the nurses had jingle bells on their scrubs but before I could figure out why my nurse was taking my blood pressure, which was way too high because of pain I'm sure; and temperature. Before I realized it my doctor was walking in. And to put my doctor in a nutshell, he's the quintessential guy doctor, all we do is talk sports and movies then right at the end he asks what you need. This morning we talked about the Dallas Cowboys, which is sacred territory to me, and Tiger Woods almost winning on Sunday. We talked about this stuff for at least ten minutes and then we summed up the appointment with a quick skim of what I needed. It's nice to be able to just be casual with a doctor, by far the best I've ever had. Just after thirty minutes of being there I was already waiting for my medicine at the pharmacy window. I was even home by 11:30 and the appointment was at 10:45. 

     As soon as I pulled into my driveway I noticed a medium sized box on my porch and knew it had to be some Christmas gifts. I must say, me and my family are on the ball with gifts this year, good prices and good gifts equals happy family members and a happy me. 

     The medicine I'm on requires me to eat when I take one so I decided on scrambled eggs in the microwave and that turned into a ham and cheese omelet, which was fantastic, I totally nailed it. I'm eating my delicious ham and cheese omelet and watching NFL Network wondering what I'm going to do for the rest of the day since it was only noon. Well, that changed awfully quickly. My parents needed me to go to McAlester with them, which is an uncomfortable forty-five minute drive since Oklahoma's roads are absolutely horrible. That little trip didn't consist of anything really worthwhile in my opinion. I arrived back at my house around 4:30 and was once again looking for something to do, but that changed quite quickly again. A couple of my friends wanted to hang out and watch Inception and I hadn't seen it so I definitely was going to do that. By the way, one crazy awesomely fantastic movie, Leo DeCaprio has been killing it with his movie choices. 

     By eight o'clock I was back home and dozing in front of my TV and ended up taking an extremely needed nap. The only problem now is, I'll probably not be able to sleep again because I took that two hour nap earlier. But, that shouldn't be a problem because the only plans I have for tomorrow are putting up my Christmas tree, as long as my knee complies and lets me. 

     Now, as I finish out my day watching Psych season one, I'm glad everything turned out the way it did. Because, I've had a very boring life as of late and this day was probably one of my most interesting ones in awhile. And it came on Pearl Harbor Day, which coincidentally has been a good day for me since '07.  

My Movies

     Just in case the blogging community is wondering, I am going to start everyone of my blogs with "My something". I'm hoping it'll turn into something clever. 

     Now, to the real reason I'm typing. I really don't have much to say but that collecting movies is a lot harder than you would think. It's crazy how fast technology changes. I have about 400 movies and just about everyone of them I truly enjoy. And of the 400 only 2 are Blu-Ray. And I'm sure everyone knows how fast they, "they" being "the man" (ha j/k); pushed out VHS tapes. Before we knew it we all had DVD players and CD players and now we all have HDTV's and that's already becoming obsolete. In just a few years all my DVD's will be just like VHS were about 10 years ago. And look at iPod's, iPhone's and everything else that can hold 20,000 songs. CD's are almost done with. I mean, even The Beatles are on iTunes now. I look at how fast everything moves forward in the technology world that we live in and I wonder if I'll ever be safe investing in it. As I type on my Toshiba laptop, watch my Blu-Ray DVD player threw my HDTV and text on my Blackberry, that informs me that its 32 degrees outside and what the score on the Monday Night Football game is, I just sit in wonder... and a little amazement. The point of all this rambling is I want to sell my DVD's before they become completely useless. 

     Tonight I'm watching the Tomb Raider movies. I felt I needed a refresher course in the sci-fi action movie starring an attractive brunette genre. I haven't seen these movies in awhile, should be fun. 

     

My Hair

     Over the last twenty-four hours I've thought of probably a dozen things to blog about but somehow every single thing has escaped my memory. So, I'll talk about my hair. Haha! Over the last four or five months I've been trying to do the perfect do. But, for whatever reason my hair just acts stupid. Either its too poofy, too wavy, too long, too something. I use an anti-poofy shampoo and I've tried pretty much every kind of hair product out there. I'm going for a brushed back look. The best celebrity to compare it to is Leo DeCaprio's hairstyle. I searched the internet and tried everything it said, pomade, gel, hairspray, moose and some goop in a jar. But, for whatever reason I can't achieve what I want.

     Anyway, enough about that. There's a 'The Ultimate Fighter' marathon on today because the finale is tonight so I've had it on in the background. I gotta say, most of these guys are douche bags galore. It's hilarious how cocky they are and they haven't even accomplished anything. It's pretty much a tryout for UFC and they're acting like they already won the belt.

     Enough about that too. I put off getting a Facebook for a very long time but then a friend talked me into playing a game on it so I had to join obviously so I could play the game. Then, about three weeks or so ago I deleted my account because there was no real reason to have it. I never checked it and when I did the only people that said anything to me were people that I usually texted or saw on a semi-average basis. I definitely didn't see the point in having it. Then, I was definitely proven correct when no one even noticed that I deleted my account. Yesterday a friend was trying to invite me to something on it or she probably wouldn't have ever noticed. The few people that know that I don't have one are people that I told. I think that's messed up.

     I like to think I put a lot of effort into being a good friend and it seems like more and more I notice that I don't see nearly as much effort from my friends. But honestly, when I think back most of my friends weren't really that good of friends. The list is way too long in my opinion. I have a good example of something that just happened the other day. I've gone to Tulsa (which is an hour and a half away) several times picking stuff up for my friends and myself over the last few months and the other day a friend of mine wanted to go somewhere and get something (that would be for all of us) and wouldn't go to Tulsa to get it. He said he needed a better reason to go that far but yet I've gone that far for him several times. My friends are getting more and more ungrateful and I'm not the person to stick around while people are nicely being jerks. Another example is on Black Friday I texted an old friend to see how her Thanksgiving went and how she was and she'd barely give me the time of day. It just doesn't make any sense to me. I'm not looking for a thank you or an apology. I'm just looking for a friend to be as good of a friend to me as I am to them.

     I read a letter Ghandi wrote to Hitler at the start of WWII (when Germany invaded Poland). Ghandi started the letter off with, "Dear friend". Ghandi was cool enough to befriend Hitler and look at what that guy did. They actually didn't allow Ghandi's letter to be sent to Hitler but Ghandi never knew that. Now, I'm not saying we all have to be monks and super nice and never get mad or anything. I'm just saying what happened to human decency? Obviously, everyone notices when someone is a jerk and you don't know them. But, when you start noticing it in your own group of close friends maybe it's time for a change.

     I'm definitely not saying I've never been a jerk to my friends. I'm just saying at this point in my life I want to see more human decency and courtesy. Maybe it's how someone's raised, maybe it's just them, maybe it's me. I've been asking these questions to myself for a long time now.

     Another thing that's becoming divided in my life is my family. That's just become laughable now though. If either side would quit thinking so much about themselves I bet everything could be worked out quite easily. I don't wanna get into that right now though. I don't think I have enough time. ;)

     I guess I'll go fix my lineup for my Fantasy Football team. Yes I'm a geek for football. :)

Honesty

Now Playing: Train (on Pandora)    

     One thing I've been horrible at in the past is being honest. I'm not saying I'm a compulsive liar but I always withhold things and I really can't hold stuff in anymore. I've been wanting to start a blog for awhile now but never took the time. I don't assume this will turn into some movie and everyone will feel bad for me or whatever. I just want a place to vent without someone judging me or looking at me like I'm weak.

     There's a guy I see somewhat regularly at my pharmacy. Super nice guy, always asks how you're doing and its not just something he says. I can remember about a year ago I was getting a new prescription and he had to talk to about the side affects so he brought me in his office and we had a great conversation about football, golf, basketball etc.. Just guy stuff but he was a nice guy. Well, I found out this morning that he died in a car crash on his way to work. The guy had kids and he's the one that dies. I completely don't understand how all that works. I'm not saying one individuals life is more important than another but a lot of it doesn't make any sense.

     I guess I should say something about my knee too. On June 28, 2009 I blew out my knee working and spent two and a half months in horrible pain. Then, on September 14, 2009 I had surgery on it and the doctor said it was the best way to go. Well, since last year I've been limping and the last few months its gotten even worse so I go in for MRI on January 7, 2011. By the way, I'm 23 and was very athletic and loved playing golf and football. I haven't swung a golf club since spring of last year and that really hurts. The pain I could easily deal with but I can't walk on it now because it won't even hold me. Of course I've gained weight and lost muscle and gained way too much fat. I can't even work now, which sucks so bad because I'd love to be doing something besides sitting around all day feeling sorry for myself.

     Oh and my car broke down today and I'm pretty sure I have to replace it which is great because I have no money for that. Ya know, I've never done anything like this. "This" being actually talk about my problems. Some of my closest friends don't know how much emotional pain I'm in because I was brought up to "be a man" and show no pain (emotional or physical), so its been really hard for me to talk about anything with people. Hopefully, doing this will relieve some pressure off my shoulders. I'm tired of carrying everything with me.

     Last thing, if I make any mistakes or leave a word out or whatever you can correct me. I absolutely hate making mistakes. I'm quite meticulous. :)